The Fairy-Tale Detectives Read online

  Jake ignored him and turned back to Heart. “It’s your last chance. Are you coming, Your Majesty?”

  “Absolutely not!”

  “Come with me or I will turn the lion on you.”

  The Cowardly Lion roared and Heart shrieked. She nodded to Jake, and then joined those escaping into the woods. They charged through the iron gate and across the drawbridge.

  Once outside, Daphne took a folded piece of yellowing paper from her pocket. “Wilhelm’s barrier spell,” Daphne said, marveling at the ancient paper.

  “Let’s get this started,” Sabrina said.

  Daphne signaled the coven, shoving Uncle Jake’s spell into Morgan’s hands. “OK, girls, as we discussed, Morgan does the reading, Bunny handles the stones, and Baba puts on the light show.”

  More of Sabrina’s fighters darted across the bridge. Robin Hood and Little John helped Friar Tuck, who had a deep gash on his leg.

  The Cheshire Cat was next across the drawbridge. “I think they got the Scarecrow. I can’t be sure but—”

  The Scarecrow was the next out the door. The Frog Prince followed with his wife and daughter in tow.

  “My husband won’t listen!” Beauty cried as she raced into the woods. Tears were streaming down her face. “I begged him.”

  “I’m sorry!” Sabrina said.

  More and more members of Sabrina’s army came through until nearly their whole group had escaped. When they saw Sabrina’s ragtag group retreat, the Hand roared from behind the castle walls. As Sabrina had hoped, their enemies wanted to demoralize her army by celebrating their conquest of the castle. Little did the Hand know the castle was a gift.

  “Close the gates,” Henry shouted. “We’re all here!”

  “Wait! Where’s Puck?” Sabrina asked. Panicked, she searched the crowd, desperate for a sight of his filthy green hoodie or his unruly mop of hair, but he wasn’t there. She searched the sky, but he wasn’t there, either. She ran for the gates.

  “Sabrina, no!” Henry cried after her.

  “I can’t leave him,” she shouted. “Daphne, don’t you stop that spell!”

  “I’m going with you!” Beauty shouted, and chased behind the girl.

  The two found themselves in the midst of a celebration, and so they were able to slip by unnoticed. They pushed through the rowdy crowd, weaving in and out of monsters, until they found Puck. He was still fighting and completely outmatched. His opponent, a disgusting-looking creature with a pig snout and huge tusks, had his foot on the boy and would not let go.

  “Oh, hey ugly,” Puck said when he saw Sabrina. “Sorry, I’m a little busy.”

  “Is this yours?” the creature snorted.

  “Yes,” Sabrina said.

  “Then fight me for him,” he grunted.

  Sabrina looked up into his face. He stood several feet above her, but as she was trembling she noticed the creature’s leaky pale eyeball. He was going blind on his right side. What had her father said? Look for weaknesses?

  “Fine, piggy, let’s fight!”

  The creature swung at her, but she darted to his right, where he couldn’t see her. She noticed a nasty red wound on his rib cage, fresh and bleeding. She leaped and kicked the spot, and the monster bellowed in pain. None of the other villains noticed the fight, as they were too busy ransacking what was left of the castle. When the creature bent over, Sabrina noticed the green ooze coming from his furry ear. It was infected, and she did as she was trained. She punched it as hard as she could, and the monster fell over, shrieking and sobbing. As he did so, he set Puck loose.

  “You saved my life,” Puck said, standing. “Well, that’s a change of pace.”

  “Fly us out of here,” she commanded. “Wait, where’s Beauty?”

  Sabrina once again scanned the crowd but for only a moment, as she was soon airborne. Puck had her by the waist and the two were flying skyward, narrowly dodging the spears and arrows flung at them from below.

  “Do you see her?” Sabrina said. “We can’t leave her.”

  “There!” Puck shouted, pointing toward the castle gate. Beauty and the Beast were arguing and Beast had his wife’s arm clenched tight in his hairy claw. She was sobbing.

  “How could you turn your back on us?” the Beast said.

  “Please come with me! I’m begging you! The Master lied to you. He lied to all of us.”

  Sabrina frowned but knew she had to do something. “Set us down, Puck.”

  “Um, isn’t your sister about to—”

  “Just do it.”

  When they hit the ground, Sabrina stepped between Beauty and the Beast.

  “Listen, pal, she loves you. Despite your stupid furry face and the fangs and the crappy attitude and the fact that you might be evil, she loves you and she’s trying to save you. Since you’re not listening, I’m going to lay this out for you. You have thirty seconds to decide.”

  Stunned, the Beast could do nothing but listen.

  “We didn’t lose this castle. We gave it away. And now, Baba Yaga, the Wicked Queen, and Morgan are outside reproducing the magic spell that put a barrier on this little town. Except we’re putting the barrier over this fortress, locking up as many of the Hand as we can. So you can stay if you want, but if you think it stunk to be trapped in a little town before, wait until you face eternity in a castle infested with trolls, goblins, witches, and monsters—and no indoor plumbing.”

  The Beast reeled.

  “Twenty seconds,” Sabrina said.

  “Please, James,” Beauty begged.

  Suddenly, Mr. Canis appeared near the drawbridge. “Sabrina! You have to get out of there now!”

  “You’re supposed to be with the children,” Sabrina said, startled not only by his presence but by the panic in his voice.

  The Beast turned toward his cohorts. “It’s a trap! Everyone, out of the castle, now!”

  “Puck! Get Sabrina out of there!” Canis shouted.

  Before Sabrina could say anything, Puck had her and Beauty in his arms and they were flying over the wall. They landed with the waiting army.

  “Cast the spell now!” Mr. Canis shouted. “They know the plan.”

  “What are you doing?” Robin Hood demanded.

  “We’re putting the Hand in time-out,” Daphne said, and Morgan began to read from the magic spell. The words were ancient and not in English, but Morgan handled them with ease. Bunny Lancaster tossed a handful of stones into the air and they stayed suspended before her eyes. She moved them around, as if working some elaborate puzzle only she could understand, switching their places, tilting them, and flipping them over. Baba Yaga raised her hands and squatted down like an angry monkey. She shrieked and bellowed as if demanding the spell to work. All the while, members of the Hand spilled out of the gates.

  The Beast was first, then the Swan Brothers, Shere Khan, and the entire nation of Lilliputians. The glass cat, Bungle, and Humpty Dumpty were next, followed by a couple of trolls and goblins. Then Mowgli, Baloo, and Jack Pumpkinhead.

  The sky began to lighten, and above the castle Sabrina could see the beginnings of a concrete dome. It looked as if it were being assembled, stone by stone, by an invisible workforce. The faster Morgan read, and the more the Wicked Queen adjusted her rocks, the faster the dome materialized. Nearly a dozen more members of the Hand were able to escape, but soon the last rock was in place. There was a loud booming noise much like the echo of a heavy door shutting and then the stones were gone.

  The next person to cross the drawbridge was the Ice Queen, but she tumbled backward halfway across. She stood up and placed a hand out, pushing, but it was clear there was something blocking her way. The Ice Queen raged and blasted it with hail, but her magic had no effect whatsoever.

  “What have you done?” the glass cat asked.

  “I think they call this winning a battle,” Henry said, beaming with pride at his daughters.

  Nottingham was one of those who had escaped. He pushed through the crowd and confronted the mayor. “Wh
at are you doing with these traitors?”

  “They saved me,” Heart said. She seemed confused and disoriented.

  “Saved you?” Nottingham bellowed.

  Uncle Jake stood between them. “Relax, Sheriff, the lady is injured.”

  “You have betrayed me!” Nottingham shouted at her.

  “I have not!” the queen roared back. She hardly needed her megaphone. “The Grimms saved my life against my will!”

  “What kind of fool do you take me for?” Nottingham said. He reached into his long leather jacket and removed his deadly dagger.

  “So, what do we do with them?” Arthur said, raising his sword to Nottingham’s chin.

  That quickly silenced the argument.

  “We let them go,” Sabrina said, turning to the Beast. “Get lost and tell Mirror that two little girls beat his big old army.”

  The Beast turned to his wife, defeated. When she didn’t say anything, he slinked into the woods with his daughter. The other escaped members of the Hand followed him, with Nottingham bringing up the rear. Just before he disappeared into the trees, he turned and flashed an angry look at the Queen of Hearts, who glared indignantly back.

  “Oh, no! Mom!” Mordred cried, rushing to the barrier.

  Sabrina searched for what had gotten the warlock so upset. Inside the barrier, trapped with the Hand, was Morgan. Despite the chaos around her she smiled softly.

  “We’ll get you out!” Mordred cried. “Don’t worry. I’ll make the other witches break the spell.”

  “I couldn’t leave Seven,” Morgan said. “I couldn’t bear to think he was in here with them, all alone.”

  Uncle Jake’s shoulders slumped and he stared at the ground.

  “Mom, you can’t stay in there. That castle is filled with maniacs,” Mordred said.

  “Honey, I’m a pretty powerful witch. I’ll have no trouble getting everyone in line. Don’t worry about me.”

  Mordred looked at Sabrina, then back at his mother, and then stepped through the barrier to join her.

  “Mordred, they need you!” Morgan cried.

  “I’m not leaving my mother,” he said, and then turned back to the others. “I’m sorry. You’ve got all the magic you’ll need.”

  Sabrina nodded. “Take care of your mother. Is there anything we can get you?”

  Mordred nodded. “I need my video games.”

  Sabrina laughed. “As soon as we get a chance, I’ll deliver them myself.”

  “We should go. Your mother and the others will be worried,” Henry said.

  Daphne said her good-byes as well and the victorious army headed into the woods. Sabrina took one last look at the castle before it disappeared from view.

  fter reuniting with Veronica and the children, the army marched single-file toward Mount Taurus. Soon, they came upon a site the Widow had found that looked perfect for the next part of Sabrina’s plan. She let the crowd know they could stop.

  While everyone went to work setting up a campsite, Mayor Heart slumped against a tree, her feet straight out in front of her. Uncle Jake knelt beside her and offered her his water canteen. She drank greedily until the canteen was empty.

  “He tried to kill me,” she wheezed, bordering on hyperventilation. “Nottingham tried to kill me.”

  “I’m not surprised,” Uncle Jake said. “He’s a violent man with a dark past. You’re lucky I was there.”

  The queen looked up into his face and her eyes narrowed. “And exactly why did you help me? You should have left me to die after the unfortunate incident with that woman.”

  Sabrina was enraged. That woman!! Briar’s death wasn’t an unfortunate incident! Heart and Nottingham killed her in cold blood. How could Uncle Jake tolerate Heart now? Where was his fire for revenge that only days ago had threatened to drive him insane? It made no sense to her that her uncle was now showing kindness to a woman he once wanted dead.

  “I couldn’t leave you,” he said. “That’s not what Briar would do.”

  The queen’s face softened and she let down her guard. “Well, I suppose I should thank you.”

  “That’s not necessary. But there is one thing that would make me very happy,” Jake replied as he reached into his jacket. He withdrew a dagger. Sabrina suddenly panicked. He was going to kill her! But then Jake placed the knife in the queen’s hand. “Stay alive. I don’t think we’ve seen the last of the sheriff. When he shows his face again, I hope to be there to protect you, but if I’m not, you may have to use this.”

  The queen looked down and appraised the blade. Sabrina thought she must have had more than a few experiences with deadly weapons.

  “I’d hate for you to die before I let you out,” he whispered.

  Heart stared at him in utter shock. Then her face parted in a smile filled with yellow teeth.

  Sabrina set her pack on the ground and scanned the clearing. It was high on a hill, which was ideal. She and Daphne had once had a foster father whose backyard had a similar steep incline, and the girls tormented him for hours with well-aimed acorns and rocks.

  “It’s a good hill—gives us a great view of the surrounding forest,” Pinocchio said as he stood nearby, also studying the camp. “At least for the night. We’ll have to find a new one in the morning and every morning until we got the job done.”

  “We?”

  Pinocchio nodded. It was the first time she had ever heard him express a sentiment that wasn’t selfish.

  “Your father should be proud,” Sabrina said, even though the words sounded funny in her head.

  “I’d appreciate it if you’d tell him that,” Pinocchio said. “I’m fairly certain he thinks I’m a spoiled brat.”

  He drifted away as she studied their new camp. It was then she noticed out of the corner of her eye that Mr. Canis was hovering nearby. She turned to him, uncertain of what to say. She knew she was supposed to yell at him. That’s what you did when you were in charge and someone didn’t follow your rules. But she never wanted the responsibility, and it seemed even worse if she had to yell at people she cared about. How was she supposed to scold an old man who was just trying to feel valuable especially when, deep down, she knew she had only sent him to look after the children so that she wouldn’t have to worry about him in the battle?

  “I had my reasons,” he said as if he could read her mind.

  “And I had my reasons,” she replied. “I know you don’t want to babysit. I know you want to be in the middle of the fight, but—”

  “I couldn’t let you get trapped inside the castle with the Hand,” he said.

  “Mr. Canis, the spell was for Everafters. I wouldn’t have gotten stuck in there with those lunatics. I’m human. I know that no one wants a couple of kids running the war, but—”

  Canis interrupted. “It won’t happen again.”

  She wasn’t sure she believed him, but she was relieved she didn’t have to argue with him. She thanked him and watched as the old man hobbled off to join the others.

  • • •

  Once everyone had rested briefly, Sabrina gathered her army around her. As she looked at them she realized that the worry and fear in their faces was gone. In fact, they were looking at her with a newfound respect. She was no longer at the kids’ table—for better or worse.

  “We got lucky at the castle,” she said. “We managed to trap a majority of the Hand in our little cage, but we can’t rely on luck anymore. There are still a couple hundred goons left in these woods, and they are looking for us. When they find us, we have to be prepared.”

  “What do you have in mind?” Snow asked.

  “My sister and I faced a lot of weirdos before you met us, and we always managed to put them in their place. To do that we’ve had to plan ahead with some things they would never expect. That’s why I’m putting all my faith in the king of the unexpected, Puck.”

  The crowd let out a collective groan.

  “This forest needs the Trickster King treatment.”

  “Oh yeah?” Puck s
aid as he pushed through the crowd.

  “I want to make the Hand crazy. Think of these woods as your own little playground. Do you have some ideas for shenanigans?” Sabrina asked.

  Puck smiled. “Major shenanigans.”

  “Are you sure about this?” the Widow asked. “He’s not known for caring exactly who gets pranked. Who’s to say we all won’t wind up in some pit full of syrup and fire ants or something else just as bad?”

  “Listen, I know he’s immature, mischievous, and frustrating, but that’s exactly why he’s the man for the job. He’s going to booby-trap every inch of these woods and we’re going to help bring his twisted visions to life. Mr. Boarman and Mr. Swineheart will work on designing his traps. Gepetto and Pinocchio will help build the intricate parts. Unfortunately, the rest of us have the worst jobs. We have to collect the ingredients he wants, and from my experience, some of that stuff is going to turn stomachs.”

  Puck laughed. “It’s going to turn more than stomachs. Some of the stuff I want will scar you for life!”

  The community went to work on Puck’s plans. It took the rest of the day and well into the evening for them to build some of the wild ideas that came from his fertile imagination, including spring-loaded catapults, cannons that shot all sorts of muck and filth, cages that dropped from above, and trip wires that set off explosions. He wanted ditches dug and filled with angry badgers. He wanted logs hoisted high into trees, tied to ropes that swung them down to pulverize approaching villains. He worked magic spells that turned ordinary shrubs into poisonous plants that would cover a person with itchy sores. The Pied Piper and his son, Wendell, used their musical instruments to lure a furry army of deer, rabbits, possums, squirrels, and chipmunks to do whatever Puck wanted. But what got him most excited was his hope that Bunny could open a new door to his enchanted bedroom.

  “When the old lady’s house imploded, the door to my room was destroyed,” he explained. “But the room still exists somewhere and it’s got all the special supplies I need. Plus, I sort of miss my chimpanzee army.”

  The Wicked Queen promised that she would do her best.